A VANISHING SOUL

What Does It Mean to Exist in A World That Would Flinch If You Vanished???

To Wake Each Day and Feel Like an Echo of a Person…

A Shadow Cast by A Light That Never Belonged to You?

They Say Loneliness Is a Temporary Ache

But What If It Hardens into Bone,

Filling Every Part of You Until You No Longer Remember What Warmth Felt Like.

There Is a Cruelty in Being Surrounded by People Yet Realizing You Are Nothing More Than Scenery in Their Lives,

A Background Presence…

Useful, Disposable, Forgotten

What Is Worse to Be Hated:

Which At Least Proves You Were Seen

Or To Be Ignored as Though You Were Never Real to Begin With

Some Nights I Wonder…

Am I Live,

Or Am I Only Rehearsing the Motions of a Life No One Will Ever Remember?

And If No Memory Will Hold Me When I Am Gone,

Then Tell Me…

Did I Ever Truly Exist at All?

How Long Must a Soul Endure Before It Earns the Right to Vanish???

They Say Pain Makes Us Stronger,

But What If Strength Only Chains Us Longer to A Life We No Longer Recognize???

Is It Weakness to Seek Peace…?

When The War Inside Has Already Claimed Every Survivor?

I Wonder When Suffering Becomes Unbearable,

Is Choosing Death A Kindness or The Greatest Sin?

And Who Decides?

The God Who Remains Silent?

The World That Never Noticed?

Or The Broken One Who Has Carried the Weight Far Too Long?

How Many More Nights Must Be Bled into The Dark Before Silence Counts as Salvation

If Love Was Meant to Heal,

Why Did It Carve Wounds That Never Close?

If Hope Is a Lifeline, Why Does It Feel Like a Noose Tightening with Every Breath?

Perhaps Existence Itself Is the Cruellest Trick…

To Be Told We Are Infinite, Yet Beg Every Day for An Ending

To Be Forced to Carry a Soul That Only Longs for Rest

So, Tell Me…

At What Point Does Living Become Nothing More Than a Slower Way of Dying???

Remember;

Sometimes You Suffer Not for Being Bad, But for Not Knowing When to Stop Being Good.

Published by Eva Mwangi